Underwear?

Back in High School--when I was the editor of the school newspaper--a fellow journalist was taking a hit at answering a question for our Advice Column.  The advisee had mentioned feeling inadequate or unhappy with herself and inquired as to what she might be able to do so that boy's might start to like her.  The advisor in question proposed a response in which she would suggest simply buying new underwear.  At first, the staff was skeptical.  But I went ahead and let her go with it so that we could see what would come out of it.

I honestly have no recollection of what the outcome was, but I do recall contemplating the benefits of buying new underwear and how that could possibly increase confidence.  Thinking about it now, this is what I've come up with:

When you're down and out and feeling really crappy, just buy yourself a new pair of underwear and go from there.  The affect on your psyche will actually prove much more rewarding than you'd think.  The right pair vs. the wrong pair could do so much as make you feel like a seductress...or a worm.

When you have the wrong pair, you are uncomfortable.  You physically dislike the fabric covering your "secrets" and you are the only person who knows about them at that moment.  You take them out of your drawer, already knowing you don't like them, put them on and carry an unpleasant disposition for the rest of the day.  You set low expectations for yourself and what can come out of your day by choosing the wrong underwear and this adversely affects the way people will feel around you.

The right pair on the other hand can empower you.  When you get dressed in the morning, put on a pair of britches that make you look sexy, that hug your curves just the right way, or maybe accentuate a little something here and there.  For the rest of the day you will vibrate sex!  By choosing to embrace your own sexiness and admitting that "I am sexy, I don't have to try to be" you will carry with you an aire of seduction.  People will recognize the confidence that you have simply through the comfort you have gained in choosing the right pair.

This concept works similarly as the "mantra in the mirror" would.  By giving yourself positive energy, you will receive positive energy from the outside world.

In other words, you get what you give.

So why not get what you paid for and enjoy a good pair of underwear?

It's not like you'll get hurt...
Unless you want to ;-)

Why not?

"You have a Bible on your bedside table."

"Yes I do, it's my best friend's.  I keep forgetting to mail it back to her.  ...I like God."

"God isn't real."

PAUSE!

I'm sorry, you know what?  You kind of suck.  I'm tired of this ridiculous fascination with hating God.  Just because every other hipster in the world has a thing for Atheistic ideals doesn't mean that you have to follow suit and project what you read from "God is Not Great" onto me.  I may not be a very "Christian" person, but you want to know something?

I do believe in God.

And to me God is real.

Just as the idea of God not being real is completely valid in your mind, so reins the idea that he is real in my mind.  Because you have made the decision to trust in Philosophical readings by older men who have no desire to be anything more than just an infinitesimally small being in an ever-expanding universe, you will never believe in God.  And that is fine, because that is what you believe.  And what you believe is your reality.  That's the way this sort of thing works.

But because I have decided that I don't want to be a tiny atom in relation to the vast universe, I have chosen to believe that there is something bigger than me that isn't planetary.

You argue that God isn't real because there's no proof.  It's not like you can see him.

Well, how do you know air is real?  You can't see it.  Is "air" then too just a concept rather than a reality?

"No because you can feel air."

Well guess what, that's how I know God is real.  Because I can feel him.  Certain things simply could not be in the world if there was no God.  Allow me to quote Arthur Miller's "All My Sons" with this little tidbit:

"Certain things have to be, and certain things can never be.  Like the sun has to rise, it has to be.  That's why there's God.  Otherwise anything could happen.  But there's God, so certain things can never happen."

I don't live by some ideology of God presented to me by The Bible or the Torah or the Qur'an or The Chronicles of Narnia.  My God is an idea completely defined by my own notions out of the inability for a desire to live without a higher power.

I don't care what Prophets say about God.  I don't care what Christopher Hitchens says about God.  I don't care what Jesus Christ himself would say about God.  All I care about is the fact that in the reality I have chosen for myself, there is a God.  He is in my life.

I know he exists when I hear someone laugh.
I know he exists when I witness love.
I know he exists when I realize that of all the creatures on this planet, we are the only ones granted the gift of the lifestyle any man is capable of.

So go ahead, continue believing God is not real.  Because for you, it's true.  But for me, there is a God.

I will never ask you to believe in God.  So never tell me:

God is not real.

Welcome to the World!

Did you know that the sun actually shines during the day before 3pm?

Yea...I had no clue.  Apparently, sleeping isn't the only way you can spend your morning.

I woke up this morning and realized something:  The world is a freaking beautiful place!

There is so much stimulus all around us that we can take in at a moment's notice.  The smell of fresh winter air, the sight of the sun peaking from behind the clouds, the sounds of the city, the feel of the breeze on your skin, the taste of hot coffee in the morning.  All of it is marvelous!

I have spent my entire winter break either getting up extremely late or just sitting inside all day.  I'm not a bear!  I don't need to hibernate!  I need to get out there and enjoy the world.

You know what happened when I braved the world and allowed myself to explore before 3pm?

I got a job interview at Starbucks.

That's right!  I complained about being unemployed earlier and thanks to my own positive thinking and desire for adventure, I have found myself a positively potential job.

Not only that, but I had a voice lesson today and it was fabulous!  New music day is always the best day of class.  Today I was assigned "Everything Happens to Me," "Come Up to My Office," and "It's Hard to Speak My Heart."  Wonderful songs and quite contrasting as well.  How can you not be excited with your life when everything is working on the upswing?

Positive energy really does work wonders!

I started this new thing where I wouldn't let anything get me down.  I would stay positive no matter what.  Considering that I used to be a very negative person, the transition sucked.  I was seeing so much negativity that I surrounded myself with.  I was buried in the negative energies of people around me because I fed off of it.  But now that I have positive energy, all of the negative happenings just roll right off of me.

And I honestly believe that my positive outlook has been beneficial to those around me as well.

So why don't you give it a try?

Start with one conscious decision to avoid negativity in a specific circumstance and see how that feels.

Trust me, you'll want to do it over and over again!

I must confess: I'm a Thinker

Think for yourself.
Develop your own ideas and don't be afraid to share them with others.
Be able to defend your decisions.
Understand the consequences of your actions.
Be free to choose as you see fit what to believe and what to say.
Don't let someone try to shut you down.
If you know you are correct then don't let someone else change that.

Consider the possibility that you may be wrong.  Once you understand both sides of the situation, you can truly figure out which position to take.

If your director wants you to do something that you see as inappropriate for the production, then let it be known.  Develop your argument and present it in order to defend your position.  In a Professional Theatre I do believe that there is a private time and place in which it is more beneficial to have such discourse, but Community Theatre is an open forum.  The focus is on the community.  You can't have that sort of a production without the group effort.

As the director in this situation, don't let your actors feel inadequate.  Don't make them feel defeated when you don't want to open your mind to admitting your own flaws.  You may be slightly higher on the pay scale, but you are in no way superior to the actors you're working with.  The key phrase in that is "working with."  All parts of the production team are equal.  Knowing that and allowing equality to stay strong in your team will lead to a very well-balanced company that will run silky smooth with very few snags.

As a thinker, develop your tact.  Know when and how to say what you need to say.  As a director, know how not to make your actors feel delinquent.  As an actor, know how not to make your director feel undermined.  As a person, know how not to make others feel inferior.

Think clearly, think concise, and think for yourself.  Ask questions.  Challenge opinions.  Intellectualize a situation and come up with the best solution after analyzing all possibilities.

Not only will you benefit from your intellectual growth, but so will everyone else when the world decides to open its mind to new ideas.

Forward and progressive thought is the key to world peace.
That's how strong it is.

Get Whipped into Shape

To exercise, or not to exercise.  That is the question.

Often we find that the motivation necessary for a trip to the gym very seldom arrives when desired.  We fear exhaustion and physical soreness and therefore avoid or put off the inevitable.  We eat that extra donut telling ourselves that we'll work it off later, but we never actually get around to it.  The cause of this is quite simple.

We are not exercising for the right reasons.

Ask as many people as you'd like and you will find that the majority of the populace works out so that they can look a specific way.  They find that if their physical appearance fits what they desire, then they'll feel accomplished.  Because this person is already unhappy with himself, he rarely gets the results he hopes for without pushing too hard.

Exercising should not be about becoming beautiful.  You have to realize that you are already there.  You have to be happy with yourself and decide that you want to work your body for a different reason.

Exercise because you want the body that has taken care of you for the past few years to keep on running as best as it can.  Stay fit and in shape because you want to be healthy, not because you want to "look good" in that bathing suit.

Your body can only do so much on its own.  It is your vehicle.  Much like how you have to stay up to date with tune-ups and oil changes, if you don't work on your body and keep it running up to par then it will shut down on you without warning.

Once you embrace this idea you'll learn that the results from your exercises will become much more rewarding.  You'll be happier with yourself when you realize that you are keeping yourself healthy.  And in keeping yourself healthy, you will start to love your body more and will see that you "look good" no matter what.

So stop pumping iron just to see if you can bench press 500 pounds.  There's no practical reason to work toward that goal.  Instead, see if you can run 5 miles under 30 minutes without passing out.  It doesn't matter how strong you are if you have no endurance to fall back on.  Your body needs endurance to continue running for as many years as you would like.

Do:
Eat well because you want to be healthy.
Exercise because you want to be healthy.
Live well because you want to be healthy.

Don't:
Motivate yourself with shallow reasons.
Compare your body with someone else's.
Dislike the way you are.

Love your body as best you can and it will not disappoint you.

Hiccup!

I seethe you Mister Hiccup!
My goal in life is to defeat you.
You hurt me.
This is not nice.
I hope you realize the pain you cause.
You are unruly.
This must change.
You are a mean girl!
I hate you!
You shall not pass!
You are going to be my demise Mister Hiccup!
I must not be defeated by the likes of you.
Alright...you are a worthy adversary.
You are an opponent I cannot best!
THIS IS NO GOOD!
I shall fight fire with fire!
DAMN!
I don't know how you work in the first place!
How do I defeat something I don't understand?
You suck!
You are still here!
My friend, you have outstayed your welcome.
Please leave.
You have reached your word quota for the evening.
...I loathe you...
Fine!
If I cannot beat you, I shall embrace you!
...I hate you.

You call that a relationship?

You guys don't do anything but fight.

Every time I meet up with you separately, you're on the phone with your boyfriend and he's nagging your ear off while you have somehow managed to place the phone somewhere completely out of earshot.

You complain about each other.

You wish you had freedom.

You come to me for what he can't give you.

Really?  And your excuse is "The love is there, somewhere."

I'm sorry, but don't pull that bullshit with me.  You hate sleeping with your boyfriend because he has the libido of a rock and does nothing but complain about the heat in your house when it falls below 70 degrees.  You tell me how much better I am than him.  You confide in me because I am more understanding.  You and I have never gotten into a fight and every moment we spend together is worthwhile.

So why am I still the one that is left by the roadside, single and alone?  I hear people say, "We're just really good friends.  I don't want to mess that up by changing the relationship."  MESS WHAT UP?!  Wouldn't you rather be in a relationship with a really good, understanding, cute friend who knows how to satisfy you over a boring, nagging, selfish guy that you dove into things with before thinking anything through?  I know I would!  I don't see anything wrong with being in a relationship with your best friend, in fact I think it might be more beneficial.

Even if you don't come around, I'm going to let you know these things:

I will always be here for you, no matter what.
I love you and I know you love me, because somehow when it's you and I we have no problem saying the "L" word.
Though I will be here for you, that doesn't mean I'll wait around.
Someday, you'll see what you missed out on.

And if you're the boyfriend in this situation reading this blog, don't hate me.  I didn't do anything wrong.  I'm simply picking up on the slack that you leave behind.  Maybe you should have a talk with your partner about monogamy.  Even so...

You're a lot luckier than you think.